He wanted advice, but..
Being a single parent is never an easy task, and anyone who had any children from a young age would know that its not a walk in the park. But one young man tried to do what he believed was the right thing, and reached out online for help. He was a 23-year-old single dad who is struggling with an unexpected reality. Disappointed as he had a lack of social life due to increased parenting responsibilities, it was hard for him to advance at work, and impossible to date anyone else new. He eventually came to the conclusion that it may be a good idea for him to put his now 2-year-old son up for adoption.
The young father had shared that he was the one who convinced his college girlfriend not to have an abortion due to his religious beliefs. He also accepted sole responsibility for their child afterwards.
After her pregnancy, he asked her not to abort the child and she reluctantly agreed but stressed that once the baby was born, it was up to him to raise their boy. He wrote in his post on Reddit: “I was graduating that year and already had a pretty well-paying job lined up so I felt that I could provide for my kid.”
However just after a mere 2 years later, and now he is starting to feel the strain of wanting to have a normal life of a young adult while raising a kid. “I just feel so tired and secluded from the world. My only friend is my son, between work and him I have no free time. All I do on my free time is go to the park with him, watch kids shows etc. My mom lives kinda far away but she visits every few months and lets me have some alone time but it’s not enough,” he wrote in a Reddit post.
He also added that due to his “parent responsibilities”, he has not been able to advance at work and was unable to date as a 23-year-old who already has a child with another woman.
Now the young father is saying that he is considering to give his boy up for adoption so that he could be raised by a “more stable family” – and users were mostly disapproving of it.
But no matter how stressful parenting can become, most do not actually arrive at this conclusion. The young man also admitted that there are only two issues which are entirely personal, and perhaps seen as selfish complaints by many. Getting personal time back is not a good reason to give up the boy for adoption at all – to them.
“You signed up for this,” one person responded to his post.
“I feel so angry for that child,” another person commented afterwards.
Someone else even reminded him that his son “isn’t a pet”.
After reviewing comments and realising that no one was going to support his idea, the young father has since reconsidered his decision.
“I think I was just in too of a dark place to see how bad this post is and even if I got a lot of non-constructive comments that hurt, I got a lot of comments that really hit it on the nail with how bad it would be to follow through with this as well as giving me really sound advice,” he replied in an update to his previous Reddit post.
For now, the young father is going to try therapy and joining some single parent groups for help – he also plans to hire a babysitter. He added that he is going to reach out to his ex-girlfriend, though he is “pretty sure that she hasn’t changed her mind”.
“Lastly, I just want to say that I love my son and that I genuinely thought that him getting adopted by a stable family would be better for him. I can now see how that can mess him up in so many different ways. I think I might have some sort of postpartum depression that comes and goes and when I wrote this post I think I was at my lowest,” he concluded.
Therefore dear readers, what do you think the father should have done? We await your response!
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