Reasons why women cheat, according to a relationship expert

I used to think I had a solid grip on why infidelity happens, but the more I read about the reasons why women cheat, the more I realized it’s a lot more complex than I’d ever imagined. Cheating stings, and it often spells heartbreak for everyone involved. Yet it still happens, despite the enormous risks. Now, one expert has explained six primary factors behind this phenomenon, offering a fresh perspective on what drives some women to break their vows.

1. Feeling Emotionally Unfulfilled

Source: Freepik

One of the biggest reasons why women cheat lies in emotional neglect. I’ve seen this in friends who tried to communicate but felt like their words never truly landed. According to a study done in the UK and Australia, around 65% of women who cheated said emotional emptiness was at the heart of their decision. Conversations that stay shallow or go ignored can leave anyone feeling alone, but for some women, this loneliness propels them toward an affair.

What Does “Emotional Unfulfillment” Look Like?

Psychology Today suggests that when discussions always remain surface-level, or supportive responses are absent, women might feel emotionally abandoned. Over time, that sense of neglect can push them to find comfort elsewhere.

2. A Deeper Emotional Abandonment

Source: Freepik

Sometimes it’s not just feeling overlooked; it’s feeling truly disconnected from a partner. While men do stray for emotional reasons too, the research shows women are four times more likely to cheat if they believe their partner isn’t really into them. Tracey Cox, a world-leading relationship expert, points out that only about five percent of men cite this cause, but for women, it’s a bigger issue tied directly to self-esteem and emotional security.

3. Revenge After Disloyalty

Source: Freepik

I’ve heard friends admit they cheated purely out of a desire to “even the score.” This third common motivation stems from a form of retaliation: a partner betrayed them first, so they retaliate in kind. Tracey Cox says it’s about regaining agency and dignity after feeling wronged. It might not be the healthiest response, but that urge to hurt someone in the same way you’ve been hurt can be irresistible.

4. Power Imbalances in the Relationship

Some women cheat to regain control in relationships where they feel inferior. They may sense a constant power struggle over finances, status, or major life choices. If a partner is overly dominant or controlling, stepping outside the relationship can seem like a twisted path to self-empowerment. As Cox explains, if direct confrontation feels too risky, a covert affair might feel like the only way to tip the scales.

What Causes Power Struggles?

A few examples include:

  • Financial disparities
  • One partner making major decisions without input
  • Blame constantly placed on one person
  • Feeling unheard or dismissed

5. Dissatisfaction in Bed

Source: Freepik

It’s not just men who look elsewhere for excitement in the bedroom. A lackluster sex life is one of the reasons why women cheat, too. Nearly nine percent of women who strayed said it was simply because they weren’t getting their needs met at home. The fix often involves open-mindedness, trying new things, and honest discussions about desires. When both partners feel respected and satisfied, the temptation to seek thrills elsewhere generally goes down.

6. Stress Management

Source: Freepik

Sometimes, the simplest explanation is stress. Balancing work, raising a family, running a household—these responsibilities can feel crushing. According to Cox, some women turn to an affair to escape feeling overwhelmed or underappreciated. It’s their version of “me time,” a moment to indulge in pleasure rather than being stretched too thin by constant obligations.

The Expert Behind the Insights

Tracey Cox has made a career out of helping people navigate love and intimacy. She’s authored 17 books, shared her expertise on CNN and Oprah, and even launched her own line of bedroom-enhancing products. Her insight into the reasons why women cheat gives us a window into the emotional and psychological landscape leading to infidelity.

Preventing Infidelity Through Connection

If there’s a silver lining here, it’s that many of these factors boil down to unmet emotional or physical needs. Taking time to truly connect—through conversations, shared hobbies, or simply laughing at life’s curveballs—can keep a relationship healthy. Cox also advises mixing it up in and out of the bedroom, because novelty can reignite the spark that keeps two people faithful.

Building a Stronger Bond

At the end of the day, even good relationships have lulls. Boredom might set in, or life just feels too routine. Yet understanding these six reasons why women cheat can help couples address underlying issues before they boil over. By staying open-minded, trying new experiences, and remembering to communicate about the little things, partners can fortify their connection and minimize the risk of straying down a painful path.

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Love and Peace

Bryan Seal
Bryan Seal
Bryan is an American novelist and Veteran of the United States Marine Corps. Between those careers, he’s worked as a deckhand, commercial fisherman, divemaster, taxi driver, construction manager, and over the road truck driver, among many other things.

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